When I was younger (say…6 – 10 years old) I used to pretend my parents weren’t my ‘real’ parents. I had a ‘real loving’ mother and father out there desperately looking for me. My ‘real mother’ having had me as a teenager had no choice but to give me away but she’s older now, gotten her life together and realizes that she can’t live without me.

On some days it was my mom wanting a playmate for my sister; steals me at the hospital, my ‘real’ mother spends the rest of her live and resources searching for me. On other days I pretend I was switched at birth and when my ‘real’ parents find out they return the fake me for the real me! I had a lot of scenarios but it all ended with me being reunited with parents other than the ones I already had.

Those thoughts got me through troubling family times and moments when I felt unloved or my parents were being unfair.

Occasionally I’d include my siblings in my fantasy because I figured I’d miss them, so then our ‘real’ parents were renowned scientists, who left us with ‘Sam and Lucy’ to go on an expedition to the North Pole, they’ve been lost for years and everyone’s given up on them. But they survive and make it back to claim us all! But there’s a twist! My oldest brother (who made my young life a hell) can’t come because he is ‘Sam and Lucy’s’

Fast forward to almost 20 years later, I’ve dealt with the fact that my parents, shitty or not are my real parents. Acquiring a wicked stepmother en-route; I felt was some sort of karma or lesson for all the years I prayed for a ‘new mother’

These days my pretence is with my job. I like to pretend I don’t really need my job, that it’s just something I’m doing to while away time till I turn thirty which is when I come into my inheritance.

See, in my little pretend world and keeping with the theme of my ‘real parents’ they’re filthy rich, they died and my inheritance is in trust till I turn thirty but there’s a catch, I need to have been gainfully employed full time for at least ten years! Which would explain why I’m at my shitty job. So whenever I’m hating my job, I pretend I’m only doing it till my inheritance kicks in in a couple of years, then it’s not so bad at all.

I should be doing something that matters like helping people and making a difference not aiding in the global corporate greed.

PLAYING: 5 Years – Bjork

READING: Diary of a Manhattan call girl – Tracy Quan

WATCHING: Everwood

QUOTE: “I'm so bored with cowards”