A co-worker is getting married at the end of the month; meanwhile her ex gives her a gorgeous Fendi purse. She brought it to work for a bit of show and tell because, you know, she’s sooo hot and her ex can’t get over her and every body wants her!

She asked me how much I thought it costs, which made me feel special because that would mean, you know, I’m Fendi-ish even though I’ve never had anything Fendi in my life, except for this bag I bought at a street corner in NYC which my sister (queen of everything original) said was tacky and made me get rid of. I called it my Fiendi.

Anyhos, I suggested we ask my ‘friend’ who works at the Fendi store next door. Ok so maybe he’s not exactly my friend but he waves at me all the time and the other day he excitedly told me that Hank Azaria was going to be shooting a scene on the other side of our building! I sat at my desk all morning watching and called everyone in Maryland and told them I was watching Hank Azaria argue with a big-boobed woman in a pink top (live)… that was cool!

So anyway, we go and the purse is (a real Fendi) from the summer collection and it’s $2000CND. So now my co-worker’s not sure how she feels about her ex anymore… the same guy she broke up with because he made her feel ‘inferior’. She thinks she may still have feelings for him (yeah… $2000 worth!) She confused… she doesn’t think she can go through with her wedding and yada yada yada… I tell her not to be silly and that it’s just cold feet and she should think about the platinum number icing her finger.

She drags me (kicking and screaming) to lunch with the ex, because, you know, the guy’s always trying to play with her mind and she doesn’t want to face him alone. Mr. Ex seemed harmless enough, hard to believe he drove her to insanity but you never know…

He bought us drinks and we sat there talking for almost 2 hours! I took a 2 ½ hour lunch! I went back to work slightly tipsy and very sleepy! I’m so bad!

See, I’m not like this at all! The last time I did something like this was years back when we cut class one morning to go to Josie’s cousin’s flat to watch porn, drink beer and smoke stale cigarettes. Those were the good times! Till Josie’s cousin’s boyfriend came home and found us watching his porn and drinking his beer. He got angry and drove us (4 girls) back to school. We could have been dismissed had it not been for Josie’s father who had a lot of clout in the school.

PLAYING: Don’t you love me - Eternal

READING: Hey, Nostradamus! – Douglas Coupland

WATCHING: Black Hawk Down

QUOTE: “Why does granny have to walk the streets?”