My boss is strange and I like that! If it weren’t for the crappy pay, the actual work, the people I work with (well just mini boss) and the fact that I hate my job; I’d have loved to work there for the rest of my natural life. Sometimes the boss and I have the strangest conversations… like this morning he walks into my room and goes:

boss: do you speak Punjabi?

me: I hesitate thinking it’s some kind of trick question err…. no

boss: do you want to learn how to speak Punjabi?

me not really. Why?

boss we’re funding a project to have each staff speak at least one of the widely spoken languages. I thought you might want to speak Punjabi

me hmmm… I don’t know… how about Janice (woman of Indian descent)?

boss apparently she’s not Punjabi, doesn’t speak it nor want to, she’s doing Cantonese instead

me oh ok… but doesn’t Sue (woman of oriental descent) speak Cantonese?

boss: no, she’s Filipino remember? besides she wants to learn Farsi.

me: well… can I just learn French instead?

boss: you don’t speak French? how can you not speak French? you filled a bilingual position

me: never mind… where do I sign up for Punjabi lessons

A while later… during a staff mtg.

boss: geez, you must spent all your salary on clothes!

me: no, not really (mumbling under my breath) I bet with what you pay me it’s a real shocker that I come in here clothed at all!

boss: excuse me?

me: (smiling) nothing

boss: well I thought I heard something smart about your pay

me: no, nothing…

boss: that’s good because anyone who complains about their salary gets fired!

Close to the end of the day…

boss:(slams a file on my desk) why did you send this application back?

me:(after thorough review) because I don’t understand what “bad latte thai supreme cup decision” means

boss:(bursts out laughing) honey… it’s “bad faith and the supreme court decision” but that’s good!

me: you got that from just reading it?

boss: no he called me

me: so how was I supposed to know what it meant?

boss: hey, I don’t know… why all these questions?. It’s not my fault the guy has lousy handwriting!

PLAYING: there’s gotta be more to life – Stacie Orrico

READING: Hey, Nostradamus! – Douglas Coupland

WATCHING: nothing…

QUOTE: “Than chasing down every temporary high to satisfy me”