e l s b r o . d i a r y l a n d . c o m

reflections on that thing i'm living called life!

2001-04-17/12:28 p.m.

The pretty white screen stares back at me while I think of what to write. This growing up business is tough. No one prepared me for itÖ It sort of jumped out at me and I had to adjust to fit.

Why is it that when life gets a little much better youíve got to have boundaries and restrictions to spoil it?

As a child I couldnít wait to grow up, basically because I wanted to do all the grown-up things I wasnít allowed to do! Now Iím all grown up and Iím not so sure, for one all those grown up stuff isnít what itís hyped up to be. Sometimes growing up sucks big time, I donít even know how people do it. I admit it does have itís pecks, I get to make my own decisionsÖ I get to decide whatís right and wrong. Try as they may the final decision lies with me. Which is pretty neat since I never had a say in anything as a child.

A very wise person once told me that true happiness comes from within, finding that place within yourself where your soul is pleased with what youíve done with yourself. I think he got that from Oprah or the Dalai Lama. In essence, whether young or old, I should look at the person Iíve become and determine if itís worth rejoicing.

When I look at the person the years made me, then Iím not so bummed out about growing up. Growing up has thought me a valuable lesson I could only have learnt through experiences. My love for life and happiness can only mature with age. The most important element however will have to be my mind. My mind that allows me to make choices only unique to me. That prompts me not to conform to someone elseís idea of what the perfect life should be. Iím a different adult because of age and happy for that. I guess Iím not going to live forever so I might as well live while Iím alive. After all, didnít someone say only shooting stars break the mold?